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During lunch conversation yesterday I told CLAW about an interesting situation that occurred a few days back while Lex and I were tearing the shit out of the Locust horde in the interest of preparation for GOW2.

Somewhere between popping heads and blender-busting boomers we got to talking about Duke Nukem 3D. For a few days I had been, annoyingly, saying “Damn! I’m lookin’ goooooood” in my best (terrible) Duke voice and I think I was saying it every time I blew the face off of some poor slob in aviator goggles – which was a lot. A lot.

So I wanted to show her the first few levels of the good ol’ DN3D. A history lesson in ass kickery, if you will; an example of the refinement of a genre we both enjoy. Also, a suprisingly candid view into my very much younger self.

The game holds up. It’s not UT3 or anything, but it holds. So I’m showing Lex the strippers, showing Lex the toilet secret, showing Lex the dead Doom Marine. She’s totally into this. Almost every turn brought a “Sweet!“, “Dude!” or “This is, like, a 13yr old’s dream!”

Somewhere in there she says, “This is so awesome! Why didn’t they make a sequel to this?”

I’ll wait for a few minutes while you roll around on the floor laughing/crying/shitting your fucking self.

You back? You clean? There’s more. I say, “They have been working on the sequel since this game came out. It is called Duke Nukem Forever, and it it supposed to rock copious amounts of cock.” She says the following:

“Oh. I thought that was just some joke on the Internet.“ 

Look, I am betting you just shot milk out of your nose. You didn’t even have to be drinking milk for this to happen. You’re sitting there reading this with a glass of Vernors and a Halloween Snowball and milk just came shooting out of your nose. I know it happened. Don’t deny it. Split that Snowball with me.

CLAW pointed out how totally meta that is. It’s like Frank Herbert did a ten gallon hat full of coke and decided to write comedy. It’s a shame within a shame, a joke within a joke within a joke within a reason to fucking hang yourself.

This idea got me to thinking about ironic meta-comedy. That idea got me to thinking about white kids rapping, and how meta it is that there are now some absolutely amazing white nerd/geek rappers who, themselves, are being parodied for comedic effect. That got me on to musical theater which got me on to this:

Bitches Aint Shit A Capella – Watch more free videos