2005 is upon us. Lo, who would have dreamed we would be here and not flying around in hover-cars? Last I heard, in 2005 the Predator was in town with a few days to kill and Khan had just started his journey into deep deep deep space – sleeping. Oh to be Khan. I could use a few hundred years of nap about now. And those awesome man-maries. Eugenics, where did you go wrong?
When I was a kid, 2005 was a milestone. Everything was going to be happening by 2005. I’d imagined one world government, holographic action figures, 100mb hard drives – 2005 would be the year of the best stuff ever. Were I not to have lived through the in-between time, perhaps I’d be stunned with what really has come to pass in the last chunk of yearage; As it is, however, it is easy to be let down.
For some reason I thought that at 12:01am, Jan 1st, we’d have fucking robots everywhere. Hot robots. Cherry 2000 robots. Jean Claude Van Damme would be fighting cyborgs, Neo-Tokyo would be about to explode, Arnold would be about to be back after these messages and Murphy would be bulletproof. No such luck.
Cool that I have a career in computers. Cool that I can store 60 days of music in a palm sized thingy and beam it all over the place. Cool that I am likely to live 30 years longer than my grandparents did. Not cool that I can’t rehydrate a pizza for 5 in 15 seconds. Not cool at all.
So: Welcome to 2005. The chicks are hot, the rovers are over-efficient and the pizza still takes 45 minutes to get to your front door.
And I’m still rambling. Rambling on.